Spotlight for The Sovereign Self by Stacey Dutton with an Excerpt

 

The transition into the sixties often brings questions about what remains, what needs releasing, and how we relate to ourselves. These themes appear throughout The Sovereign Self by Stacey Dutton, which looks closely at emotional mastery and self-definition during this chapter.

The Sovereign Self examines the inner shifts that take place as women move into their sixties—a time when familiar roles, expectations, and emotional patterns begin to feel less aligned. Stacey Dutton explores this decade as one defined by discernment, presence, and the desire for greater internal coherence. She addresses topics such as the evolution of identity, emotional conditioning, changing relationships, the role of silence, the significance of solitude, and the emergence of joy as a cultivated practice. Dutton also includes reflections on physical change, chronic pain, and the need for a renewed relationship with the body. The book encourages women to approach this chapter as a return to their truest selves, moving with clarity and self-governance.

Amazon: https://amzn.to/48rD71T

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/243569125-the-sovereign-self

EXERPT:  The Architecture of Emotional Mastery

“You have power over your mind—not outside events.

Realize this, and you will find strength.”

~ MARCUS AURELIUS

    For a woman to be emotionally masterful in her sixties is not about mere resilience; it is about refinement. It is not about enduring hardship, but about engaging with life’s complexities with intention, intelligence, and grace.

EMOTIONAL MASTERY AS A DISCIPLINE

By our stage of life, we have encountered loss, reinvention, and profound shifts in identity. We have known both the exhilaration of new beginnings and the ache of things left behind. And yet, despite all we have lived through, true emotional mastery is not something we inherit simply because of experience. Rather, it is something we cultivate with discipline.

The difference between women who struggle through their later years and those who move through them with deep, unshakable presence is not related to their circumstances. It depends on their level of emotional mastery. Those who engage with their emotions deliberately, rather than being ruled by them, typically step into a state of emotional sovereignty—a place where external forces no longer dictate their internal stability.

MASTERY VS. SOVEREIGNTY

Mastery, in its truest sense, is about deep understanding more than control. To master our emotions does not mean suppressing them or forcing ourselves into an artificial state of positivity. It means learning to engage with our emotions as they arise, discerning which of them requires action and which requires release. It means standing in the midst of uncertainty, grief, or change and responding rather than reacting.

Sovereignty is the natural result of emotional mastery. When a woman reaches a place where her emotions no longer control her—a place where she can sit with discomfort without fear or experience joy without guilt—she becomes sovereign over her inner world. She is no longer subject either to the whims of others or to old wounds and the weight of societal expectations. She does not seek permission to feel, to express, or to change. She moves through life with an authority that cannot be given or taken away.

If emotional mastery is the discipline, emotional sovereignty is the reward.

THE MIND AS AN EMOTIONAL ATHLETE

Much like physical strength, emotional mastery requires active engagement. A woman does not wake up one morning emotionally agile, just as she does not develop high muscle tone overnight. Emotional engagement is a practice, like going to Pilates class or lifting weights a few times a week. And yet, many women enter their sixties believing that emotional maturity should be automatic, a natural byproduct of their age.

This is a fallacy. A woman who neglects her emotional strength and agility will find herself bound by old wounds, reactive tendencies, and outdated narratives.

But a woman who deliberately trains her mind—who practices stillness, discernment, and inquiry—will discover a different reality. She will no longer be pulled into every emotional undercurrent. She will not be at the mercy of her past. She will move through her days with a kind of cultivated stillness, unshaken by the temporary and attuned to what truly matters.

This is the foundation of everything that follows in her life.

Stacey Dutton is an entertainment executive, creative producer, and emotional mastery advocate with more than three decades of experience across the music, television, and film industries. She was the original on-air host of TLC/Discovery’s Clean Sweep and later the casting director for the Emmy Award–winning Clean House on The Style Network. Through her developing platform, Live Sovereign Self, she guides women in their third act toward clarity, boundaries, and emotional sovereignty. Stacey lives in New Preston, Connecticut, with her husband and their rescue dog. Visit Stacey at her website and on Instagram.